Au Pair? Au Contraire!

Never overestimate the interpretation skills of someone who speaks English as a second language. English, with all its contradictions,
dialects, slang, idioms and nuances, takes way more than 9 months to figure out. Sometimes we, especially me, tend to forget that.

It was kind of funny, back in December we had informed Asmira that we needed to know if she planned on staying for her second year. We needed to know by mid January because if she didn't plan on staying, we needed to start the interview process again. I guess we never stressed the staying "where" part. When my folks were at our house over Christmas, my mother had told me that Asmira told her that she was planning on staying. I had also heard the same from my brother in-law and mother in-law. After nine months of living with someone for whom English was a second language, I had learned that a lot gets lost in translation. So when my family would tell me these things I started asking them, what exactly did you ask her? Did you ask; are you planning on staying for your second year or did you ask; are planning on staying with us for the second year? Anyone who talked to Asmira always forgot the latter half of the question which... is really the most important part. I'm just as guilty. About two weeks before the deadline, I asked her do you plan on staying a second year? She replied I think so, I really like it here. I was so relieved but it was only after I was telling Sheri later that evening that I realized I did the same thing, I didn't ask "where". Fast forward two weeks to the deadline and we're all sitting at the dinner table and I ask again. Asmira, do you plan on staying a second year? She said "Oh yes, I love it here, I don't want to leave, I plan on staying the full two years."

I was relieved for about 15 seconds when it dawned on me that hey idiotself you still have not asked "where". By now, after listening her to rave about how much she loved it "here", I thought the "where" part was pretty moot at this point. I remember thinking "She loves it here, she's not going anywhere". But because it was the deadline I felt I better make sure there were no misunderstandings. I asked do you plan on staying "with us" for your second year? Without hesitation she said "No - I move in with a family in Baltimore for my second year". I knew it!

It's down to the wire now. Asmira officially has 14 days left at our house. It's been a wonderful year for me, Sheri and the kids. We can't say enough about Asmira and the program in general. Sheri and I were disappointed that she decided to complete her second year with a different family. However, we understand that if we were in Bosnia and had an opportunity to live within walking distance of a lifelong friend, we ourselves would probably jump on it as well. Asmira's best friend is in Baltimore and she is moving into a host family down the street from Almira. We can't say we blame her.

Asmira was excited about the move back in January/February, these last few weeks the realization of change has set in. The aforementioned excitement has turned to anxiety as she will be starting over with a new family in a new location with new rules. Sheri and I are confident she will do well.

What have I learned?

1. Bosnians are mentally tough and work hard.
2. Bosnia reminds me of Pa, I would like to visit.
3. I'm far more paternal than I thought even though Asmira is 24 and I'm th...not.
4. By Bosnian standards, I baby my two boys.
5. Not all Muslim women wear veils, in fact when going out; some of them wear very little clothing and a lot of makeup.
6. Bosnians are not confined by time; at least they act that way - an enviable trait for many Americans.
- For Asmira's birthday we bought her a very nice watch because we noticed she didn't have one. As it turns out, in Bosnian Culture, watches are never given as gifts. In fact, it is an insult.
- We gave her an alarm clock when she first got to our house and I don't think it has even been plugged in yet.
7. My family's life was positively influenced by Asmira. I hope we were to her.


We are looking forward to our new au pair that will be at our house on Good Friday. Her name is Lucianna and she is 21 year old from Brazil. She speaks English pretty well and Portuguese is her native language.

Tribute Trends

Am I the only one to notice a disturbing new trend in death memorials? As if roadside memorials weren't enough, I'm starting to see more and more homage being displayed on rear car windows.

If you haven't seen one of these rolling tombstones yet, trust me you will. I haven't really been keeping track but I would venture to say I have seen no less than 5 different ones over the last year. I really need to keep a camera handy with me because I want to get a picture of one. I was coming out of the Starbucks the other day and tried to take a picture of one on the back of minivan with my camera phone but of course that didn't work. I'll keep trying.

Call me old school but I tend to think the best place to memorialize our loved ones is at a cemetery not on a vehicle. Look, if I'm dead, use your car for what it's meant for and come visit me dammit! Don’t be parading around announcing to a bunch of people I don't know that I'm dead. I mean, nothing says impermanence like a decal plastered on the back of losing investment.

I hereby give authorization to anyone who wants to, that upon my passing they may place the following (using my name of course) on the back of a 1991 Nissan Sentra;
To complete the trifecta of annoyance hang a set of fake testicles from the bumper (talk about having issues) and drive around doing 10 mph under the speed limit.

Guilty

Is it possible that the MSM could have misled the public anymore on the trial of Scooter Libby? Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to defend Libby; I believe he perjured himself and obstructed justice and should have to do some jail time. I, unlike the left, believe felonious perjury and obstruction are serious crimes no matter what the circumstances, i.e. lies relating to non-crimes (such as this case) or about sex. We are however talking about the Democratic Party, the party that introduced us to "hate crimes" and believe that violence against one minority group warrants you more punishment than violence against another group.

One thing that has to be made perfectly clear is and was made known by the investigation is; Libby was NOT the one to out Valerie Plame as a CIA OP. It was then Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage. If this is news to you, well you certainly haven't been following the case well enough. If you think that's news, how about this? Special Prosecutor Fitzgerald won't be bringing charges against Armitage. Why? (Hmmm, what's the best way I can put this?)

IT WAS NOT A CRIME!

Do you think you'll hear that interesting tidbit in the news? Don't bet on it.

Color me partisan all you want but here is what I have learned from the 3+ year investigation;

1. Libby lied and obstructed justice into the investigation of how Valerie Plame and her classified job at the CIA was leaked to reporters.

2. Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage was the source of the leak.

3. Armitage will not be charged as the leak does not constitute a crime.

4. Armitage is a real piece of work. He could have nipped this in the bud early on by saying he was the source of the leak. Instead he chose to let Libby twist in the wind and trip himself up to the grand jury. Libby made his bed however and he has to lie in it.

5. The person most responsible for the demise of his wife's CIA career was Joe Wilson. Mr Wilson chose to go public with the false accusation that his report debunked the claims that Iraqis had gone shopping for uranium in Niger and it had been circulated to senior administration officials. He had to know that these officials and reporters were going to question why a retired ambassador to Niger was sent on this mission by the CIA. The answer most certainly pointed to his wife and to divert attention from himself he concocted a conspiracy theory to implicate the President's closest aides. It's sad so many took and still take this buffoon seriously;

Red Flag #1. Wilson had long been a bitter critic of the Bush Administration, writing in such left-wing publications as The Nation that under President Bush, "America has entered one of it periods of historical madness" and had "imperial ambitions."

Red Flag #2. He was affiliated with the pro-Saudi Middle East Institute and he had recently been the keynote speaker for the Education for Peace in Iraq Center, a far-Left group that opposed not only the U.S. military intervention in Iraq but also the sanctions and the no-fly zones that protected Iraqi Kurds and Shias from being slaughtered by Saddam.

Red Flag #3. Mr. Wilson has said that he opposed military action in Iraq because he didn't believe Saddam had weapons of mass destruction and he foresaw the possibility of a difficult occupation. In fact, prior to the U.S. invasion, Mr. Wilson told ABC's Dave Marash that if American troops were sent into Iraq, Saddam might "use a biological weapon in a battle that we might have.

Red Flag #4. Mr. Wilson had no apparent background or skill as an investigator. As Mr. Wilson himself acknowledged, his so-called investigation was nothing more than "eight days drinking sweet mint tea and meeting with dozens of people" at the U.S. embassy in Niger. Based on those conversations, he concluded that "it was highly doubtful that any [sale of uranium from Niger to Iraq] had ever taken place."

So to wrap up, the CIA sends a retired Bush-bashing diplomat with no investigative skills on a mission so sensitive to National Security and no one is supposed to question who directed it? Everyone knew the Iraqis were buying yellowcake but that actually gave creedence to the War in Iraq. Justifying the war in Iraq means more votes for the right and the left will do anything in their power to stop that from happening.

Not so Bright

Madeline Albright has come out and said that she thinks that Iraq is going to go down in history as the greatest disaster in American foreign policy. I guess if I had any doubts about what we were doing in Iraq, Ms Albright has just affirmed that we must be on the right track in Iraq. You see, in my world it was Ms Albright and the Carter Administration whose failed foreign policies got us where we are now. Lest we forget that Madeline Albright served on Carter's National Security Council.

Those that forget history, are bound to repeat it and no matter how many times that gets said, the left just continue to turn a deaf ear to the past. Somehow, liberals have a way of elevating their proven failures to Hollywood status and trotting them out as "experts" in a topic they've completely botched up. Carter in his four years as president, four years that begat the term "misery index", was a foreign policy nightmare. His whole human rights and his unwillingness to use disproportionate measures illustrated the folly of pursuing a policy of understanding in a world replete with dictators and despots. He lectured Americans on the foolishness of their "fear of communism", and the Soviets responded by invading Afghanistan. He tried to appease the mullahs in Iran, and they responded by holding dozens of Americans hostage, releasing them the moment Ronald Reagan was inaugurated (someone not unwilling to use disproportionate measures, just ask Libya). Instead of declaring war on Iran and taking them out, we sat wringing our hands for over a year, lost eight military men in a bungled attempt at a rescue, and kicked perhaps the worst president of the 20th Century out of office in the fall of 1980.

Fast forward to 1993 and the 8 years of foreign policy ineptitude (four of which Madeline Albright served as Secretary of State) that directly resulted in the American slaughter on 9/11. What if the first attack on the World Trade Center had accomplished its goal of bringing down the building and killing thousands? What would our reaction been then? Just because 6 people died we did nothing? How about the USS Cole? What would we have done if the magazine had been breached and killed all aboard? Why didn’t we act? How about the US Embassies? What would we have done if the building had been blown up as intended and killed all US personnel instead of 250 locals?

You want to know what the greatest disaster in American Foreign Policy is? Liberal influence.

The fact that Madeline Albright can sit back and criticize someone else is reprehensible. How soon we forget.

Random thoughts on Superbowl XLI

I will never eat another Snicker bar, ever!

Rain makes for slippery foot balls. Someone forgot to tell both teams.

Venue should rotate every year to all cities not just ones with domes or warm climates.

How old is Prince? Somehow I surpassed him.

Anyone on Indianapolis' offensive line could have been MVP.

Peyton's hand wringing after his receivers get folded like cardboard is annoying.

Jim Nantz is annoying.

Phil Simms is not.

I liked JB better on Fox.

Blockbuster mouse made me laugh.

Coca Cola and Doritos did not.

Paper, Rock, Scissors can be hazardous to ones health.

Black coaches winning superbowls is a trend I can live with.

183 days until training camp.

Here we go Steelers! Here we go!

Ah Leah!

Now there's a song you don't hear on the radio everyday or every decade for that matter. Say what you want about the "jack " music format but they do play a wide variety. You're certainly not going to hear Donnie Iris on DC101 or the classic rock station 94.7.

Back in the day, specifically my Washington Park Ice Rink Day, Donnie Iris and the Cruisers had a couple of big hits, well at least on Pittsburgh Radio; Ah Leah!, Love is like a rock, My Girl and the criminally ignored and personal favorite Sweet Merrilee.

Turns out Donnie is still in the Pittsburgh area, still tours, got himself a new album and a website.

Check it out here (for nostalgic value I might just get myself a shirt):

http://www.donnieiris.com

Start Running

And that goes for me as well. I've been doing a weight training regimen that emphasizes squats and dead lifts, thus my running has fallen to the wayside.

Forget about the aesthetic benefits of running and concentrate on trying to find the spiritual side of running, almost like Zen running or something. It's kind of a hard thing to envision until you've actually experienced it and you won't know you've experienced it until you find yourself being drawn to it. This attraction is what will become your motivation. You have to trust that it is there, because you're certainly not going to feel it for awhile, when you're dragging yourself out for a run and your shins feel like they'll explode and you think your quads could double as banjo strings. It's more about freeing yourself from your surroundings and being able to focus on where your mind's going. Running not only is capable of clearing your mind at the end of a day, but I think it assists is problem solving, goal attainment (as far as where you want to be and what direction to take to get there), and a variety of benefits only obtained by reaching into the depths of your mind where only running can take you.

You don't have to believe all that but once you've been there, running (and exercise in general) will become as much a part of your life as waking up in the morning.

Here is what the run schedule for spring is looking like;

April 21, 2007 - 9:00 am - Run For Hospice 10k/5K - Leonardtown, Md
www.runforhospice.org


Great local race, I like it because: 1) its on a Saturday and 2) starts at 9:00.

May 6, 2007 - 8:00 am - Bay Bridge Run 10k - Sandy Point Park
www.annapolisstriders.org

One must register early for this one as it is usually closed by the end of March/beginning of April.

I like all the Annapolis Striders Races as they always serve beer after the race. If you've never run 6 miles or 10 miles and then downed a couple of beers all before 10 am, you're really missing out.

June 3, 2007 - 8:30 am - ANS 10k & 5k Run\Walk - La Plata Md
Registration details and link to website to follow.

I expect everyone within a 100 mile radius of La Plata to register for this one as Sheri and I are the Co-Chairs for the event. Proceeds from the race go to the building of new athletic fields as we currently have none.

Last year's event brought out 100 participants to run the 5k course and corporate contributions netted $13,000 to the school. We hope that with the success of last year's event and the addition of the 10k that we can beat those numbers.

Sandy "Burglar" (name is almost cliche at this point)

So you're former President Clinton's National Security Advisor and you're called before the 9/11 Commission to testify. What do you do?

Do you go the National Archives to refresh your memory and maybe get rid of some of those embarrassing non-job related emails you were sending around to your colleagues? I seriously doubt it. It wasn't like his title was assistant to the regional Security Advisor or Secretary of the Security to the national advisor, it was NATIONAL SECURITY ADVISOR.

So just what was Sandy Berger removing from the Archives? If you're up on the story, you'd know that several Archive employees were suspicious of Berger removing documents and it was only after witnessing him stealing did they initiate an investigation; an investigation that caught him hiding documents under a construction trailer. My question is what was it and how much did he actually remove before they even started the investigation? What was his motivation? Common sense would indicate to me he was removing items that may have been damaging to himself and the Clinton Administration. Am I too partisan to see that Berger's actions were inconsequential to the 9/11 Commission? Does anyone actually believe the pilfered documents were no big deal? Didn't his actions compromise national security?

This is the kind of stuff movies are made of. Someone from the archives should have called Bob Woodward at the Post. I'm sure he would have exposed this for the egregious abuse of power it was.

Yeah right.

Never Admit Defeat

Your president is lying to you
This war is illegal
You cannot win this war

What's the first thing that comes to mind? Sound familiar? Probably does, but I wonder if it's because you recognized the mantra that was spouted at American GIs by the infamous broadcaster Tokyo Rose during WWII. Perhaps, but more likely it is familiar because it's what we see and hear in the news media everyday. Isn’t this the message delivered by the mouthpieces of the Democratic Party? Granted they preface their message with a "we support our troops" but then belie that statement by saying;

Our president is lying to us
This war is illegal
We cannot win this war.

I'm always left wondering how people continue to say we are "losing the War in Iraq. From a militaristic standpoint, nothing could be further from the truth. I mean, are our cities be taken over by the enemy, are our bases being taken over and occupied, are we losing more men than they? No, not even close.

General Patton once said "You're never beaten until you admit it." No war is ever won by killing every member of the enemy. Wars are won by destroying your enemy's will to fight. How can we do this when almost every major news outlet and most democrats are out "Tokyo Rosing" the war in Iraq wanting us to admit defeat?

I thought the main objectives of going into Iraq were;

1. Impose our will in the region to find out once and for all if Iraq had WMDs. Mission accomplished.

2. Depose an evil egomaniac who wanted to control the entire region and threatened our way of life. Mission accomplished (if you don’t believe Saddam threatened our way of life, maybe you’d enjoy driving some overpriced hybrid to the grocery store to get $10 loaf of bread or $15 gallon of milk while our economy would slip into the worst recession we probably ever would see.)

3. Instill a western style democracy much like we did in post WWII Europe, a modern day Marshall Plan if you will. The idea was\is; that western style freedom, once rooted, would be the cure-all for 30 years of Middle East Mayhem. Mission Accomplished? Not even close.

No one ever said number 3 would be easy or occur in a short period of time. Somehow Americans forgot, even know that it was said repeatedly, that the liberation of Iraq would be a long arduous journey (how liberals can be against liberation is beyond logic but that is for another blog). Think about all the places we have intervened militarily, last I checked we were still in Japan, South Korea, Germany, all over the Mediterranean, the Balkans and Cuba, for crying out loud.

To leave Iraq now means the modern day Tokyo Roses have won, American and Iraqi lives lost were in vain, and anyone who would seek to do harm to the United States would have a free pass to inflict mayhem upon us.

Am I Missing Something?

I received this in an email and liked it so much I thought I would post it. Pretty good stuff;

The Democrats promised "A New Direction For America"

The stock market is at a new all-time high and America's 401K's are
back.
A new direction from there means, what?

Unemployment is at 25 year lows.
A new direction from there means, what?

Oil prices are plummeting.
A new direction from there means, what?

Taxes are at 20 year lows.
A new direction from there means, what?

Federal tax revenues are at all-time highs.
A new direction from there means, what?

The Federal deficit is down almost 50%, just as predicted over last
year.
A new direction from there means. what?

Home valuations are up 200% over the past 3.5 years.
A new direction from there means, what?

Inflation is in check, hovering at 20 year lows.
A new direction from there means, what?

Not a single terrorist attack on US soil since 9/11/01.
A new direction from there means, what?

Osama bin Laden is living under a rock in a dark cave, having not surfaced in years, if he's alive at all, while 95% of Al Queda's top dogs are either dead or in custody, cooperating with US Intel.

A new direction from there means, what?

Several major terrorist attacks already thwarted by US and British Intel,including the recent planned attack involving 10 Jumbo Jets being exploded in mid-air over major US cities in order to celebrate the anniversary of the 9/11/01 attacks.

A new direction from there means, what?

Just as President Bush foretold us on a number of occasions, Iraq was to be made "ground zero" for the war on terrorism -- and just as President Bush said they would, terrorist cells from all over the region are arriving from the shadows of their hiding places and flooding into Iraq in order to get their faces blown off by US Marines rather than boarding planes and heading to the United States to wage war on us here.

A new direction from there means, what?

Now let me see, do I have this right? I can expect:

The economy to go South

Illegals to go North

Taxes to go Up

Employment to go Down

Terrorism to come In

Tax breaks to go Out

Social Security to go Away

Health Care to go the same way gas prices have gone

But what the heck!

I can gain comfort by knowing that Nancy P, Hillory C, John K, Edward K,Howard D, Harry R and Obama have worked hard to create a comprehensive National Security Plan, Health Care Plan, Immigration Reform Plan, Gay Rights Plan,Same Sex Marriage Plan, Abortion On Demand Plan, Tolerance of Everyone and Everything Plan, How to Return all Troops to the U.S. in The Next Six Months Plan,A Get Tough Plan, adapted from the French Plan by the same name and a How Everyone Can Become as Wealthy as We Are Plan.

I forgot the No More Katrina Storm Plan.

Now I know why I feel good after the elections. I am going to be able to sleep so much better at nights knowing these dedicated politicians are thinking of me and my welfare.

Smoking Cessation?

Gunther (taking a drag off of Chandler's cigarette): "Oh, Dark Mother...once again I suckle at your smoky teat."

Tobacco and I have had a history together, 24+ years to be exact. That’s right Mom, I was using tobacco products even in high school. The Topol Smoker’s Tooth Polish I was using at the time should have been a hint but I’m glad you didn’t pick up on it (love you Ma). That’s how stupid of teenager I was, I would see those Topol commercials and think “Jesus, if my folks see how brown my teeth are getting from smoking, I’ll be busted for sure”. Never mind that I was probably only smoking like 3 cigarettes a day but when that guy on commercial would blow into that paper, it looked like friggin mud, man! Well, I just couldn’t be having brown teeth, Mom and Dad would just know for sure I was smoking. So what do I decide to do? I’m going to buy and brush my teeth with toothpaste specifically designed for smokers, genius, sheer genius.

It’s been two and half years since I quit smoking and a year and a since I quit chewing. Here is my not so orthodox method of quitting:

Start exercising (pretty orthodox start). It was just dumb luck that I fell into running. We had been to Killington skiing in 1997 for a week and my legs were so sore on the second day that I swore I would never let me legs slow me down like that again, Ever! I started using a treadmill and before long, pounds were dropping and miles were accumulating. Seven years later after races too numerous to count and the miles by the thousands, I can recommend shoes, I know about mid-sole and bounce and over pronation and under pronation, I know every bone in the foot, I know what can cause plantar fascitis, I know about the periformis muscle and knees and ACLs and MCls but no matter what you know or how much you know or how much you think you know, somehow people just can’t take you seriously when with one hand you extol the health benefits of running while on the other hand you are waving a cigarette around. That’s right, I’d finish up a ten mile run, go right to the car and light up a smoke, and I did that for years.

Here is where things get a little sketchy but hey it’s my method, I’m just telling you what worked for me. I used to give a smoker a ride home from work. Her brand of choice was Virginia Slim Menthols. Being out of smokes one day, I had to bum one from her. Now, I was smoking Marlboros at the time but in a case of desperation, beggars can’t be choosers. It was nasty, I was puffing on this thing and I said if I had to smoke these effing things everyday, I would quit altogether. Ding! (Cue the light bulb here) I thought, this might not be such a bad idea. One pack of those damn things and I’ll quit for sure. (Don’t forget I’m the guy who was using Topol to avoid getting caught smoking.)

After a year of this method and the realization that a Virginia Slim Menthol is a pretty damn good cigarette, the humility I was putting myself through had to stop.
Yes, in my zeal to quit smoking, this became my brand of choice. I chose to smoke what is undeniably the most effeminate of all cigarettes. I’m pretty comfortable in my masculinity but even this was pushing the limit. I always expected the cashier look at me and sarcastically say “you’ve come a long way, baby” after I bought a pack. I kind of wish someone would have because I probably would have quit right on the spot or dropped dead from the sheer magnitude of the embarrassment.

In April 2004, I stopped smoking completely. I didn’t stop tobacco mind you; I simply traded smoking for chewing tobacco. For some reason, I thought quitting chewing would be easier - Wrong! The nice thing about my smoking days were 1) I never smoked in the house and 2) I never smoked at work. Other than the chick I gave rides home to, no one at my work even knew I was a smoker. Chewing on the other hand, I would do that no matter where I was i.e. at home sitting in the recliner, sitting at my desk at work, sitting in a tree stand - all the places I would never dream to smoke at. When I started chewing, I told Sheri I would only do it for one year. Thankfully (although at the time I wasn’t very grateful) she held me to it and told me it was now April 2005 and it was time to quit. So I did, cold turkey, it was a bitch but somehow I made it through.

Skoal has all kinds of great flavors now like cherry, berry blend, peach, apple, and vanilla. I hate to think that if they had those flavors when I was chewing, I may not have quit when I did. While these new flavors sound tantalizing to me, I promised Sheri that I would only take up chewing again when Skoal comes up with “Swedish Fish” flavor. There will be no stopping me then.

Children's Hospital Campaign

No matter how bad you think things are, remember, there's always someone else who has it worse.

My man Cooper was diagnosed with a brain tumor, a choroid plexus papilloma in medical terms, in January 2001 when he was around 7 months old. At that time, the tumor was the size of a grapefruit. Dr Cogen at Children's National Medical Center performed three surgeries to fully remove the tumor and one surgery for a subdural hematoma from January 2001 until June 2001. He had a residual bone defect that required a cranioplasty (a titanium plate). Dr Carson of Johns Hopkins performed the cranioplasty in March of 2004.

Currently, Dr Packer who is mentioned in the article below is Cooper’s neurologist and we see him about once a year. In fact we just saw him this past Monday. Cooper started having leg convulsions (seizures) about a year ago and Dr Packer is treating these with medication. The seizures usually occur in the early morning hours and last about a minute. Ethan will come in and tell us that Cooper is having “Shaky Leg”. We’ll go in and sit with him for the duration after which he usually goes right back to sleep. If this is the worst thing that comes out of the whole ordeal, well we’ll take that.

The great news is that his MRIs keep looking better and better. His brain is growing, no signs of hydrocephalous (water build up that would require a shunt which for a time we thought he was going to have to have until we started seeing Dr Carson at Johns Hopkins) and no sign of tumor re-growth.

The article below reminds me how lucky we are. I sat and cried at my desk this morning when I thought about what this family has to go through. How can life be so unfair?

The second link is straight to the Children’s Hospital Foundation where you could make a donation. You can make a donation in honor of Cooper but you don’t have to, just making a donation would be honor enough.


Washington Post Article

Make a Donation

Who Knew?

I bet you didn't know that liberal political strategists have been reading my blog and stealing my ideas. I was reading an article in the Post the other day and it was talking about this 100 hour agenda. Have you heard of this? It goes something like this (from the article by Jeffrey Birnbaum-Washington Post Staff Writer);

"The effort they discussed was reminiscent of the elaborate business-backed lobbying campaign 12 years ago that pushed the "Contract With America," which was the then-Republican majority's legislative agenda. Conservative groups including the U.S. Chamber of Commerce and the Christian Coalition banded together then to lobby the House to pass the GOP's 10-part program.

Robert L. Borosage, co-director of the liberal Campaign for America's Future, said that approval of the Hundred Hours agenda would also help the public better understand what the incoming Democratic majority stands for. "We are still too undefined," he said, and the Hundred Hours agenda "begins that process" of redefinition."

Hmm, sounds vaguely familiar. I guess they figure now is the time to tell us where they stand on the hard issues, we know where they fall on all the unimportant "feel good" issues that won them the election. Tell us what are you going to do about Social Security, Medicare, Immigration, health insurance costs, the War, our reliance on foreign oil, terrorism. You retook Congressional Power based on anti-republican backlash, now tell us you have a direction for America. Sad truth is they have no direction, they are making it up as they go.

The critical difference between the CWA and this 100 hour agenda is the republicans had a plan and used it to get elected. The 100 hour agenda, is more like "okay, we got elected, what do we do now?"

When the major organizers are Americans United, USAction, labor unions led by the American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees, the Sierra Club, the League of Conservation Voters, the Association of Trial Lawyers of America, the Center for American Progress and several women's organizations, I suspect we'll see even more special interest rule than less.

Cease and Desist Orders for December 2006

1. Dear Lexus Automobiles,

Newsflash: People do not buy their spouses cars for Christmas. Please stop pretending they do. Every year around this time we get subjected to your ad campaigns. If you insist on continuing with these commercials, at least have the decency to use a different age group as examples of people who do and please put them in front of multi-million dollar mansions instead of modest income homes. At least make it more realistic, have the wife say something like "you know I don't like that color" or "I told you I wanted a sunroof".

I believe your target customer is someone who can't afford to buy their spouse a Lexus for Christmas but wants to think they are in a class of customer who actually can. Speaks volumes of the demographic you are trying to reach.

I ask the three Lexus owners I know if their cars happened to be a Christmas gift from their spouse, they all said no - go figure.

2. Dear Wash FM 97.1,

You really don't have to switch to the all Christmas Song format two weeks before Thanksgiving. That’s just a tad bit early don't you think? Not that your regular format is any more appealing to me but unfortunately I can’t tell my radio what stations to ignore when I press scan.


3. Dear Starbucks,

Please remove all Starbucks Kiosks from Safeway Grocery Stores. Not one of them makes the coffee like they are supposed to. It is always weak and taste like friggin Maxwell House brewed at 7-11. They are continually out of something, whether its cups, lids, syrup, etc. I've actually been to a Safeway Starbucks and they were out of coffee, that's right coffee. How can a place who's sole business is coffee run out of their main product? It's because they don't care.

They continually run your good name into the ground.

Miserably Senti"mental"

I hate having a cold. As if living with me under normal circumstances weren't hard enough, I become even more intolerable when I have a cold. When mothers are sick, they must take care of themselves and still take care of the other family members. I, on the other hand, can barely muster the will to make myself a sandwich let alone make someone else's meals. Also, having young children and being sick doesn't bode well together either; you know with the whole yelling, screaming, the temper tantrums, the whining, and the crying. It’s a good thing it's only me that acts that way because I don't think Sheri could tolerate such behavior from the kids.

My 20th Class Reunion from Trinity High School was held this past Saturday. Sheri and I were in attendance along with about 75 other classmates and their significant others. Pretty pathetic turnout considering we had like 375 in the class but it seemed as though there were some new faces there that hadn't been at the past reunions.

Somehow there has to be a better way, I got so caught up in talking to some people and by the time I got "down with O.P.P. (yeah you know me!)", I missed talking to others entirely. This was probably a blessing in disguise because of the many beer inspired conservations late into the evening were just a mixture of politics and "I love yous". Suddenly, living 300 miles from Washington just doesn't feel far enough.

Thanks to the Reunion Committee for putting it all together and thanks to all my 1986 classmates for the great memories. Here's to another healthful and happy five years.

It's sappy as hell, hippy-esh, idealistic, unrealistic and a bit silly and anyone who isn't touched by it, by just a glimpse of how it could be, may need a...

HUG. (click me)

HIgher Edumacation

Yesterday morning I was having a nice discussion about the costs of college education with a fellow Marylander who was ever so grateful that her man won and mine didn’t. Among other things, she was ecstatic that her daughter's education expenses were going to decrease. Rather than telling her that it would be a cold day in hell before she would see any decreases in education costs I went into my NOT so widely accepted view that we have made getting a college education far too easy in this country, that some people just aren't destined to be college graduates. Not trying to be elitist or the ultimate arbiter of who gets to go to college and who doesn't but is it any wonder we have moved from a manufacturing economy to that of a service economy? Is it any wonder, the construction industry is dominated by immigrants, illegal and legal? We as Americans feel that because we have a college education, we are above such vocations and we should earn more simply because we went to college. College educations have become so standard that to have a competitive edge; one must stay in school and get a masters.

Puzzled and confused that anyone could actually be anti-college education (I'm not anti-education, just pro free market), I tried my best to impart to her that a college education is an investment, anything that seeks to devalue that investment is bad. I expounded into a bad analogy between a college education and the fact that she had just bought a new BMW and it went something like this; Even though cars are a losing investment, let’s analogously pretend for a moment they are not. You work your tail off, save your money, and sacrifice all superficial expenses to buy a brand new BMW Z3 Roadster. You're not like the rich folks driving around BMWs; no one gave it to you or paid for it- no you had to take the seven year plan of scrimping and saving to have a car that you always dreamed about. You take complete satisfaction in knowing you did it yourself with no help from anyone. It also doesn't hurt that the car has got a high resale value after 5 years either. Life is good. A year later Congress passes a law that will give low interest bearing loans to people who want to buy BMWs. All of sudden, more people are buying BMWs just like yours and the resale value has now dropped a bit. No worries, right? The next year, Congress passes a law making the interest paid on the low interest loans tax deductible. BMW sales are through the roof, every parking lot you pull into has a BMW sitting in it. Now your resale value is plummeting and you're thinking, wait a minute I worked my butt off for my car, now they practically give them away. Now, BMW is always lobbying Congress to make it easier for people to buy their cars cause they know its a can't lose situation for them. The following year Congress decides to let anyone who buys or owns a BMW to deduct the cost of gas. Who wouldn't go for that? You'd be a fool not to buy a BMW. They're everywhere, hell the guy down the street that waits tables at Outback is driving a BMW for crying out loud. And although you enjoy the fruits of deducting your gas, it doesn't make up for the fact that your car after five years is now worthless.

Folks, higher education is a privilege not a right. We've made it so easy that we stripped the very competitive advantage that we so sought to obtain by going to college in the first place. The long and short of it is that what used to be a college-degree premium is turning into a graduate-degree premium and the easier we make it to obtain only reinforces that point.

Is it worth it? You decide.

Great Moments in Parenting

Last night, a school night just like any other school night I was putting the two boys to bed while Sheri tended to Isabel. As is the normal routine I got them in their pajamas and sent them off to the bathroom to do their business (what I was doing during this time I’m not really sure of but I can tell you what I will be doing from now on – keep reading). Anyway, the boys sleep in the same room with two single beds pushed together. At bed time, each boy lay in his own bed and I lie in the middle for about five minutes to settle them down. This occurs so much so that there are three pillows in the beds, one for each of us. Now in my mind’s eye I just can’t see that third pillow and where it was exactly when the lights were turned out. I crawled up into bed and instinctively grabbed the third pillow, curled up and let the weight of the day release from body. (Cue the needle scratch about right here). As I lay my head on the pillow l felt something crusty against my cheek and I’m like what the heck, is this some residual laundry detergent or something? I now feel the crust sloughing off against my face and I turn my head and smell the pillow. Whoa!! Moses smell the Roses what on God’s green earth is that?! I jump up, turn the light on and see that one of the boys puked (not a lot - about the size of a head – my head to be exact) sometime between 8:30pm and 7:00am the night before and now it’s just a stinky dried crusty mess on the pillowcase. Of course I did what any self respecting father would do – I freaked out, almost causing myself to vomit in the process. Sheri had to replace the pillowcase while I pressure washed the side of my head. Neither boy would own up to the puke. How can you puke and one not know it or two puke and then go back to sleep?



From now on, I’m implementing a 12 point inspection plan before lying down.

Until Then

I meant to get this out over Veteran's Day but it just didn't happen. Its along the lines of the "if I die before you wake" thing I sent out a couple of weeks ago. I like this one better, its longer and the music is more somber. Its a powerful reminder of the men and women who put their lives on the line for the rest of us everyday.

God Bless our troops and God Bless America.

Until Then

The file is like 5.5 megs or something so it may take awhile to download.

Election Day Rant

Politics to me are a sport and by all means, I want my team to win. The Republicans have let the Democrats take control of this election and chances are we are going to lose. Here is an armchair quarterback synopsis of where the republican leadership has failed;

They've failed to accentuate the positive and allow Iraq to cast a total blackout over domestic issues.

They've allowed the Democrats to convince 80% of the country that Republicans totally banned all Stem cell research when nothing is further from the truth.

They've allowed Democrats to paint us as wire tapping fools listening to them talk on their phones every night instead of what really is happening intercepting foreign calls that use trip words. All the while, democrats screaming about the Patriot Act when not one case of anyone's rights being trampled has been brought up.

They've allowed Gitmo to be painted as a Yankee version of a Nazi concentration camp by democrats.

They've continued to play nice with the likes of Kennedy, Pelosi, Reid, and Kerry knowing full well there was no way in hell they would play nice with you ever.

They've failed to properly put the spot light on the leaders of the Democrats Pelosi, Reid and Dean and show what life is going to be like under them and what kind of people they really are.

It is inexcusable that the RNC allowed uncontested races, Steny Hoyer in particular. Its inexcusable they let Harris waste a House seat to try for an unwinnable Senate seat, it is inexcusable that a hack like Cardin is even close to Steele, it is inexcusable that the name O'Malley doesn't cause Maryland Residents to grab their wallets out of fear.

It is inexecusable that the Republican leadership has ventured so far away from the Contract with America of 1994. This was our bread and butter, a committment to running a party of principle. The contract was most appealing because it spoke to the people who wanted to be left alone and run their own lives, a very large coalition of people by the way. A governing majority if you will.

It is inexecusable on the part of the democrats that in this very winnable midterm elections, they offer up nothing even remotely similar to the accountability found within the contract with America. All they had to do was come out and say; "here are the ten or so things we plan to do in our first year and if we don't deliver, fire us". It would be a massacre. Its much easier to say "vote for me, I'm not a republican" than to actually make a promise and than deliver on it. What a novel concept in politics.

"20 Years Now...

where'd they'd go
20 years now
I don't know
Sit and wonder sometimes
Where they've gone."

Milestones come and milestones go but if there was ever a gateway to mid-life, would it not be the 20 year high school reunion? What makes the 20th stand apart? Think about it;

a) This is the first reunion in which I have been out of high school more years than the my high school graduation age.

b) This is the last reunion that I will be in my thirties.

c) At the next reunion, the majority of my classmates will be done having children

d) At the next reunion, some of my classmates may be grandparents.

e) At the next reunion, DVE will be playing modern music (yeah right! More on this in a moment).

Is it some type of cruel irony that makes our reunions the weekend following Thanksgiving? I realize the reunion committee is trying to get maximum attendance by holding it then, but if you're one of those people that feel like they need to slim down before the reunion then your Thanksgiving is effed, isn't it? You either drive yourself nuts by not eating all that good food or you over indulge with everyone else and feel like a fat bastard. Needless to say, two days prior to seeing people you haven't seen in a long long time. If you take the not eating route, you actually get screwed twice because after the reunion you're wondering why you sacrificed your Thanksgiving for all those other fat bastards that you haven't seen in a long long time.

WDVE was playing Quiet Riot and Ozzy Osbourne when I left in 1986 and they're still playing Quiet Riot and Ozzy Osbourne 20 years later. I feel like I'm in a musical time warp when I reach Morgantown and can start to pick up DVE. How funny is it to have the car radio on scan and hear "Bang your head, metal health'll drive you mad!"? It wasn't like it was "Metal Monday" or some other lame radio station crap , it was a Friday night. Its like they're still using their 1980s playlist. Just for fun, I thought I tune to 105.9 WAMO and see if they were playing Grand Master Flash or something.

My oldest son had to inquire "Dad, why do they say bang your head"? I said Cooper, your daddy and the rest of the 80s teenagers were the last segment of a generation that believed that world didn't revolve around them. Their problems, no matter how serious, were nothing in compared to the problems of the rest of world. Banging one's heads was simply a symbolic gesture of said stifled frustration. I went on to tell him that we didn't believe in all that "woe is me" teenage angst crap . We went to school when teachers like Mudry or Dufalla would paddle your ass if you looked at them wrong. And you sure as hell weren't going to go home and tell your folks about it because then you'd get it again. Despite all your best efforts to the contrary, the schools were going to educate you. They didn't care if they flunked your dumbass three times over, you either learned or you dropped out, self esteem be damned.

School and life in general is a competition son, awards shouldn't be given for coming in last. We didn't cry about it and we sure as hell weren't going to shoot up the school over it either. You didn't like something, you got over it. You see, we had problems but so did the whole effing world. Hell, our schools still had bomb fall out shelters, we thought the USSR was going to nuke our asses and destroy the world thirty times over, we thought we could get AIDS from a handshake, we just knew the ozone layer would be depleted and we all die of skin cancer and we would have to move south to avoid the ice age that would cover half of North America in ice.

It was at that point I realized I had lost my audience as Cooper had donned his headphones and was intently watching SpongeBob. I should know better than to overanalyze a situation and rant to a six year old.

If you haven't been up to the Trinity Point Shopping Plaza, you really owe it to yourself to get over there and test your driving prowess. You see, when they planned that parking lot they used this high tech computer software program that actually mapped the random routes of 10 year olds driving bumper cars to use as a template for their parking lot. First you spin the steering wheel hard to the right, then back to left then right, "watch out for that car!". If I only had one of those big black cushions mounted in the middle of the steering wheel, I think I would've purposely taken someone out.