Au Pair? Au Contraire!

Never overestimate the interpretation skills of someone who speaks English as a second language. English, with all its contradictions,
dialects, slang, idioms and nuances, takes way more than 9 months to figure out. Sometimes we, especially me, tend to forget that.

It was kind of funny, back in December we had informed Asmira that we needed to know if she planned on staying for her second year. We needed to know by mid January because if she didn't plan on staying, we needed to start the interview process again. I guess we never stressed the staying "where" part. When my folks were at our house over Christmas, my mother had told me that Asmira told her that she was planning on staying. I had also heard the same from my brother in-law and mother in-law. After nine months of living with someone for whom English was a second language, I had learned that a lot gets lost in translation. So when my family would tell me these things I started asking them, what exactly did you ask her? Did you ask; are you planning on staying for your second year or did you ask; are planning on staying with us for the second year? Anyone who talked to Asmira always forgot the latter half of the question which... is really the most important part. I'm just as guilty. About two weeks before the deadline, I asked her do you plan on staying a second year? She replied I think so, I really like it here. I was so relieved but it was only after I was telling Sheri later that evening that I realized I did the same thing, I didn't ask "where". Fast forward two weeks to the deadline and we're all sitting at the dinner table and I ask again. Asmira, do you plan on staying a second year? She said "Oh yes, I love it here, I don't want to leave, I plan on staying the full two years."

I was relieved for about 15 seconds when it dawned on me that hey idiotself you still have not asked "where". By now, after listening her to rave about how much she loved it "here", I thought the "where" part was pretty moot at this point. I remember thinking "She loves it here, she's not going anywhere". But because it was the deadline I felt I better make sure there were no misunderstandings. I asked do you plan on staying "with us" for your second year? Without hesitation she said "No - I move in with a family in Baltimore for my second year". I knew it!

It's down to the wire now. Asmira officially has 14 days left at our house. It's been a wonderful year for me, Sheri and the kids. We can't say enough about Asmira and the program in general. Sheri and I were disappointed that she decided to complete her second year with a different family. However, we understand that if we were in Bosnia and had an opportunity to live within walking distance of a lifelong friend, we ourselves would probably jump on it as well. Asmira's best friend is in Baltimore and she is moving into a host family down the street from Almira. We can't say we blame her.

Asmira was excited about the move back in January/February, these last few weeks the realization of change has set in. The aforementioned excitement has turned to anxiety as she will be starting over with a new family in a new location with new rules. Sheri and I are confident she will do well.

What have I learned?

1. Bosnians are mentally tough and work hard.
2. Bosnia reminds me of Pa, I would like to visit.
3. I'm far more paternal than I thought even though Asmira is 24 and I'm th...not.
4. By Bosnian standards, I baby my two boys.
5. Not all Muslim women wear veils, in fact when going out; some of them wear very little clothing and a lot of makeup.
6. Bosnians are not confined by time; at least they act that way - an enviable trait for many Americans.
- For Asmira's birthday we bought her a very nice watch because we noticed she didn't have one. As it turns out, in Bosnian Culture, watches are never given as gifts. In fact, it is an insult.
- We gave her an alarm clock when she first got to our house and I don't think it has even been plugged in yet.
7. My family's life was positively influenced by Asmira. I hope we were to her.


We are looking forward to our new au pair that will be at our house on Good Friday. Her name is Lucianna and she is 21 year old from Brazil. She speaks English pretty well and Portuguese is her native language.

Tribute Trends

Am I the only one to notice a disturbing new trend in death memorials? As if roadside memorials weren't enough, I'm starting to see more and more homage being displayed on rear car windows.

If you haven't seen one of these rolling tombstones yet, trust me you will. I haven't really been keeping track but I would venture to say I have seen no less than 5 different ones over the last year. I really need to keep a camera handy with me because I want to get a picture of one. I was coming out of the Starbucks the other day and tried to take a picture of one on the back of minivan with my camera phone but of course that didn't work. I'll keep trying.

Call me old school but I tend to think the best place to memorialize our loved ones is at a cemetery not on a vehicle. Look, if I'm dead, use your car for what it's meant for and come visit me dammit! Don’t be parading around announcing to a bunch of people I don't know that I'm dead. I mean, nothing says impermanence like a decal plastered on the back of losing investment.

I hereby give authorization to anyone who wants to, that upon my passing they may place the following (using my name of course) on the back of a 1991 Nissan Sentra;
To complete the trifecta of annoyance hang a set of fake testicles from the bumper (talk about having issues) and drive around doing 10 mph under the speed limit.

Guilty

Is it possible that the MSM could have misled the public anymore on the trial of Scooter Libby? Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to defend Libby; I believe he perjured himself and obstructed justice and should have to do some jail time. I, unlike the left, believe felonious perjury and obstruction are serious crimes no matter what the circumstances, i.e. lies relating to non-crimes (such as this case) or about sex. We are however talking about the Democratic Party, the party that introduced us to "hate crimes" and believe that violence against one minority group warrants you more punishment than violence against another group.

One thing that has to be made perfectly clear is and was made known by the investigation is; Libby was NOT the one to out Valerie Plame as a CIA OP. It was then Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage. If this is news to you, well you certainly haven't been following the case well enough. If you think that's news, how about this? Special Prosecutor Fitzgerald won't be bringing charges against Armitage. Why? (Hmmm, what's the best way I can put this?)

IT WAS NOT A CRIME!

Do you think you'll hear that interesting tidbit in the news? Don't bet on it.

Color me partisan all you want but here is what I have learned from the 3+ year investigation;

1. Libby lied and obstructed justice into the investigation of how Valerie Plame and her classified job at the CIA was leaked to reporters.

2. Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage was the source of the leak.

3. Armitage will not be charged as the leak does not constitute a crime.

4. Armitage is a real piece of work. He could have nipped this in the bud early on by saying he was the source of the leak. Instead he chose to let Libby twist in the wind and trip himself up to the grand jury. Libby made his bed however and he has to lie in it.

5. The person most responsible for the demise of his wife's CIA career was Joe Wilson. Mr Wilson chose to go public with the false accusation that his report debunked the claims that Iraqis had gone shopping for uranium in Niger and it had been circulated to senior administration officials. He had to know that these officials and reporters were going to question why a retired ambassador to Niger was sent on this mission by the CIA. The answer most certainly pointed to his wife and to divert attention from himself he concocted a conspiracy theory to implicate the President's closest aides. It's sad so many took and still take this buffoon seriously;

Red Flag #1. Wilson had long been a bitter critic of the Bush Administration, writing in such left-wing publications as The Nation that under President Bush, "America has entered one of it periods of historical madness" and had "imperial ambitions."

Red Flag #2. He was affiliated with the pro-Saudi Middle East Institute and he had recently been the keynote speaker for the Education for Peace in Iraq Center, a far-Left group that opposed not only the U.S. military intervention in Iraq but also the sanctions and the no-fly zones that protected Iraqi Kurds and Shias from being slaughtered by Saddam.

Red Flag #3. Mr. Wilson has said that he opposed military action in Iraq because he didn't believe Saddam had weapons of mass destruction and he foresaw the possibility of a difficult occupation. In fact, prior to the U.S. invasion, Mr. Wilson told ABC's Dave Marash that if American troops were sent into Iraq, Saddam might "use a biological weapon in a battle that we might have.

Red Flag #4. Mr. Wilson had no apparent background or skill as an investigator. As Mr. Wilson himself acknowledged, his so-called investigation was nothing more than "eight days drinking sweet mint tea and meeting with dozens of people" at the U.S. embassy in Niger. Based on those conversations, he concluded that "it was highly doubtful that any [sale of uranium from Niger to Iraq] had ever taken place."

So to wrap up, the CIA sends a retired Bush-bashing diplomat with no investigative skills on a mission so sensitive to National Security and no one is supposed to question who directed it? Everyone knew the Iraqis were buying yellowcake but that actually gave creedence to the War in Iraq. Justifying the war in Iraq means more votes for the right and the left will do anything in their power to stop that from happening.