Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Tribute Trends

Am I the only one to notice a disturbing new trend in death memorials? As if roadside memorials weren't enough, I'm starting to see more and more homage being displayed on rear car windows.

If you haven't seen one of these rolling tombstones yet, trust me you will. I haven't really been keeping track but I would venture to say I have seen no less than 5 different ones over the last year. I really need to keep a camera handy with me because I want to get a picture of one. I was coming out of the Starbucks the other day and tried to take a picture of one on the back of minivan with my camera phone but of course that didn't work. I'll keep trying.

Call me old school but I tend to think the best place to memorialize our loved ones is at a cemetery not on a vehicle. Look, if I'm dead, use your car for what it's meant for and come visit me dammit! Don’t be parading around announcing to a bunch of people I don't know that I'm dead. I mean, nothing says impermanence like a decal plastered on the back of losing investment.

I hereby give authorization to anyone who wants to, that upon my passing they may place the following (using my name of course) on the back of a 1991 Nissan Sentra;
To complete the trifecta of annoyance hang a set of fake testicles from the bumper (talk about having issues) and drive around doing 10 mph under the speed limit.

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